PART 2 – FRIENDS SUPPORT
Many of you who are regular followers of Jo @abcdiagnosis will no doubt have had your own hair loss experiences. I use the term ‘experience’ loosely, as it is far more than an experience and words cannot do justice to what you go through. Reading around on the subject in preparation for this blog, I found many who report it being worse than the operation or going through chemo.
My dear friend @abcdiagnosis shared with me the secondary breast cancer diagnosis early in 2014. I tried not to say the stupid obvious things, of ‘oh don’t worry your hair will grow back’ nor ‘have hope’. I did my best (failing on many occasions) to listen. During one of our conversations, Jo shared how going through the chemo was bad enough, but to go through losing her hair again made both of us become tearful.
Here goes stupid obvious response ‘don’t worry, I will grow my hair and when yours returns, I will chop it off’. This isn’t stupid in terms of chopping my hair off. It is stupid in terms of me saying, ‘when it grows back’. Jo smiled, laughed and responded with ‘you don’t have to do that’. I did it to say, ‘I am here to support you’. I can’t take the cancer away, but I can make you smile or laugh for a minute and buy biscuits. Shortly after, she sent me a link to the Little Princess Trust grateful recipients for 7” plus worth of hair to make wigs for children.
Fast forward to 2016 and I am the proud owner of a mass of hair ready for chopping. I couldn’t wait to have it cut off, which Jo did think was sacrilege. A promise is a promise. I invited Jo along to the hairdressers (@GMHairdresssing) and to do the first chop. I wanted her to be part of it and deep inside prayed that I hadn’t overstepped the mark with another stupid comment.
So on Saturday 9th January we marched along to the hairdressers. The shots below show the before, during and after the chop.
You see, to those of us not in the cancer bubble, we often say stupid things. We don’t mean to and are back peddling like fury when we do. Most of the time it’s brushed off with a smile or ‘it doesn’t matter’. When you make a promise to your buddy going through a tough time, follow up with it don’t let them down! However small your support is, just do it, don’t expect a medal.
If you are about to go through losing your hair, whether it’s you’re first or umpteenth time losing your hair, do reach out and don’t go through it alone. There is no right easy way, do it your way and we are with you (in the virtual world) each step of the way.
Further support is available at Breast Cancer Chat WorldWide #BCCWW @bccww with Tuesday nights being a chatty affair. Don’t be shy.